Finding Time and Passion for Exercise
Life is and will always be a balancing act. The past few months have been a whirlwind of trying to maintain balance. I am finally enjoying getting back in my training mode and have created a little groove that I love. It’s not too much yet, but exercises that get me just sore enough to know I’m doing something good.
I have had some struggles maintaining my normal training schedule. It’s been difficult to just start again after everything. I have to admit though, it was mainly because I lost passion for a little bit. I began to hate the regimen. I started to hate the grind of it and couldn’t remember why I loved fitness so much. I had turned my perspective into full blown negative mode and was telling myself all the things you shouldn’t do. I was telling myself “It’s something I can do tomorrow.” Or, “I’m just not feeling it today.” I was allowing small negative voices telling me I was too tired. Now, don’t get me wrong I was. Nothing will change that. But I’ve been tired before. I’ve had loss before. I’ve been at the bottom and it only fueled me further into drive mode. So what was different now?
I have no clear concise answer. My conclusion, it wasn’t just one thing, it was an overwhelming feeling of everything at once. I had to remove myself from areas of usual activity to balance my emotional state. I had to sit in silence to regain my positive voice back to maintaing mental stability. It was work. I’ve spent two months in this growth process that has aligned me back with my goals, cleared my head, and feel reenergized. I had to take a step back and look at my list of priorities to see what needed to come first, what needed to be attacked, and what issues needed to be thrown away. I had to reevaluate to maintain a healthy lifestyle. I think reevaluation is good for everyone. It’s very healthy. Everyone should go through a process of reevaluation. Business do it to run smoothly, technicians constantly check machines on a daily basis to see if they are properly running in a manner that is in an appropriate range to run correctly to complete it’s task. Our bodies are machines too. We have to do daily maintenance on them. Check all areas, check the nooks and crannies, and recheck it again. You never know, you could potentially have dust bunnies throw off a simple task simply because it ruined the flow of motion. Wouldn’t want a dust bunny throwing you off would ya?
I like to describe my reevaluation as a process of regrowth. The first month being a month of rebirth, and the second being spiritual regrowth. Now, there’s just no denying that my physical wheel needs work now. So, my third month is focusing on adding more margin in my life to restructure physical activity back into my life. Not, in a way that seems daunting though, in a way that I enjoy.
When I first chose to become a Professional Fitness Trainer I did it because fitness was strictly my passion. It gave me life, it brought me energy, it made me into a stronger, better person and I wanted to empower other people’s lives to be the same way. I wanted to help people in their journey. Now, it’s like I’m completely restarting all over for myself. Yet, it’s not restarting, I’ve never been here before. I’ve always loved fitness, and all the challenges of it since I was very young. I think it mainly had to do with growing up the youngest with two older brothers. I always had to fight for survival (total exaggeration). One brother was an Allstar in like every sport he played so I constantly wanted to show him and my father I could hang. We were constantly in competition with eachother. It wasn’t in an unhealthy way, we just kind of motivated one another to push ourselves past our limits. If I saw him do it, then I knew I could push myself too. I loved racing my brother, I remember I never had the thought, I’m going to lose, I always thought this time I’m going to beat him. That was my mentality. That’s the mentality I need again. Or perhaps a brother to be around more often for a good ole race to motivate me. Man, what happened? This new voice resides within, that tells me I can’t. It’s like I’m having to rewrite my brain. It’s a big process.
Okay, so, what am I going to do now that I’m on my “physical” wheel. I’m going to take it back to the days that I didn’t compete. When I wasn’t counting calories, to the days when I wasn’t trying to force restrictions on my physical routine. To the days where it was simple. Exercise was simple. To the days when I was doing exercise all the time around the house without weights just to keep me maintained. Taking it back to the old days… High School Days. When I explored all types of physical activity to challenge myself. A good challenge always gets me rallied up.
I want to explain this is a challenge for myself, as I am looking inward. However, I feel like a lot of people stand on these exact same steps that I’m standing on now. Mom’s I know you’re tired, and I know this is cliche – “But when there’s a will, there’s a way.” Dad’s I know you may be overwhelmed with work and coming home to another list of To-Do’s, find time, don’t feel guilty, discuss it in a clear, kind way to your misses and schedule the time. If you’re married, find joy in doing it together, cheer each other on. Push each other to be better. Remember, you’re not married to one another to be someone’s else weight to carry around, you’re together to live in this life as one. Don’t judge the other for wanting to be better them’s and don’t judge yourself if you’re not there yet. However, wrestle the thought, for your own well being. I’m here to tell you, doing something is better than nothing.
That’s exactly what I wrote down on my dry erase wall to remind me to at least take one step, one exercise, one workout, towards being a healthier me again. As of right now I’m not going to overwhelm myself with the numbers. If you’re starting out as a beginner This is a must!! – DON’T TRY TO DO EVERYTHING AT ONCE. – I’m aware that adding too much at once, like restricting food, working out 5-7 times a week, no food after 8, no breads, lean diet, etc. will only have a negative effect in the beginning. It will unfortunately, demotivate me, as it can potentially do the same to you as well. Yes, exercise isn’t a walk in the park, it isn’t supposed to be easy, but as a beginner one should never try and just start for the first time with high intense workouts 5 times a week, start a diet, change everything, it’ll be all to much. Especially without knowing if you even have limitations or not.
As of now, for me, to get my head back in the game, I need to:
- Add that margin in my life. I need to set my goals.
- Test my limits, see what all I can do now that I’m done recovering from the miscarriage.
- Rewire my brain to speak motivational words not negative words that can potentially stop me. I need to get my mind back in that go mode. For when I start going, I know I will be unstoppable, I just need to remind myself how to do it again.
- Regain my passion. I will challenge myself to do all kinds of fitness regimens to find that love for fitness again. It’s not about the end results all the time. I believe fitness is supposed to be fun and a way to push yourself beyond your limits to see what you’re made of. I will find that Joy again because I do miss it.
I’m sharing this to show that everyone falls, fails, and gives up at times. I don’t like to say I did, well, I feel like for me, I just took a step back from it, to realign my inner me, so that’s not really a failure. It needed work first. I didn’t have the kind of motivation, and drive it takes to push myself past my limits. I need more devotion, and motivation to attack this hill I’m at. I know all to well, how easy it is to fall backwards and I hope that I can find a way into your heart, body, and soul enough to encourage you to try as well. Try something, try anything, get up and see what happens to yourself. Take this challenge with me! Will ya?
Let’s stop thinking about how we’ve failed. All the little voices that tell you you can’t, just because you skipped one workout this week. Just because you ate what you wanted to. Ignore it! Don’t let your past define your future. Don’t allow yourself to get in that downward demotivating path, say oh well, or I wanted it, or like me, I needed the time, and get back up and start again! Find Joy in it! Change your thinking.
Here’s to starting again! Let’s Do it!